Pornography Epidemic

But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. Matthew 5:28

Several things have prompted me to revisit this topic. The last post I wrote on this was Addictions in 2017.

One thing that prompted me occurred this week in the Senate confirmation hearing for Ketangi Brown Jackson when she was questioned about her leniency when sentencing defendants found guilty of child porn. Her sentencing was less than half of what was recommended by the prosecution. This is the same candidate who refused to define the word “woman”.  

To me, this is a sign that our culture is ignoring the effects of porn on our next generation, even to the point of lenient sentences of pedophiles and traffickers of child porn. It’s not just the legality of it, it’s the lack of moral outrage in a post-Christian world.

Another thing that prompted me was a book that my wife’s book club recently read titled “A Practical Guide to Culture: Helping the Next Generation Navigate Today’s World.”

This book is a very worthwhile read for any mentor, parent, or grandparent.  It takes on the muddy cultural waters of topics like pornography, the hookup culture, sexual orientation, gender identity, addiction, and racial tension among others. 

There is a chapter devoted to each topic and the authors, both Christians, do an excellent job of detailing the issues as well as giving helpful strategies to help the next generation navigate the “cultural waves.”

The third prompting came from a well written article in American Greatness titled “A Scientific Case for Ending the Porn Epidemic” by Pascal-Emmanuel Gobry. I mentioned this topic to a pickleball friend, Mikaela Robinson, and she emailed a link to yet another website named “Fight the New Drug” which takes on the negative effects of porn including its addictive nature, kills love and intimacy, causes loneliness and impacts mental health.

The website declares itself a non-religious and non-legislative website, but it’s treatment of the new drug of porn is excellent and backed by science.  It goes over the lies that people addicted tell themselves about porn, how addictive it is and how it changes users sexual tastes and promotes an unhealthy understanding of what should be healthy sex.

Remember, that the porn industry really came into existence when faster internet speeds permitted video content to be downloaded easily. This is not like the 1950’s when Hugh Hefner came on the scene and started publishing Playboy in 1953. Today, minors as young as 11 have access to hardcore high-definition videos.

Dr. Norman Doidge, a neuroscientist and author of The Brain that Changes Itself, is quoted as saying that 30 years ago “hardcore” pornography meant “the explicit depiction of sexual intercourse.”  Not anymore, and it has increasingly trended into videos that promote degradation, abuse, and humiliation of people never before seen in mass media.” 

“Studies show that most young people are exposed to porn by age 13,¹² and according to a nationally representative survey of U.S. teens, 84.4% of 14-18 year-old males and 57% of 14-18 year-old females have viewed pornography. That’s a lot of underage exposure to an industry that claims to be ‘adult’ entertainment.”

Several years ago, I spoke with Jolene Erlacher while we were doing a mentoring seminar at our Church which included a section on pornography.  Jolene has a PhD and is a noted author and speaker. She surprised me when she said that porn use is not just a male problem, but that she had female students at her Christian college come to her to get help with porn.

The question now is where to go with this challenge, given the pervasiveness and easy access to porn which has infiltrated our culture and is affecting the minds of the next generation?  In other words, how can we help?

Well, first, we should recognize that quitting porn is not always that easy. That’s because it is addictive, but it can be treated like any other addiction. Not all who consume pornography are addicted, but the treatment or cure involves treating it like an addiction because brain behavior has changed.

The good news?  “Change is entirely possible. Research and the experiences of thousands of people have demonstrated that over time pornography’s negative effects can be managed and largely reversed.”  Hallelujah!

As a mentor, I am never shy about asking a mentee if he is consuming porn. I know from experience that every millennial and mentee has had to deal with the problem. Some have succeeded on their own, but others need continuing help.

At a small group meeting of men at a mentoring conference several years ago, I asked them the point-blank question if porn was a problem. Every man in the group admitted that it was a big issue in his life. Most were married, but it was still a problem.

In A Practical Guide to Culture, the authors come up with 8 action steps to take, several of which are worth repeating. The first is “Wake Up” and see the consequences of porn. To do that, read any of the resources I have provided below.  

The second is to confront your own porn issues first.  Third, don’t wait until you discover porn in your kids or next generation’s lives. You must be proactive. They also suggest that parents initiate conversations about pornography. Bring it out in the open. Next, be sure to emphasize the negative consequences of viewing porn.  Then, be ready to provide a culture of forgiveness and grace. 

Finally, model loving your spouse and your children at all times. Spending time together as a close family is the best defense against porn. God created sex for those who are married, and it is our duty to be a positive model of how that plays out in real life.

MENTOR TAKEAWAY:

You can assume that anyone you mentor in the next generation is dealing with pornography – in a good or bad way. You can lean in and help your mentee be accountable and transparent.

FURTHER READING: 

A Popular Guide to Culture. Stonestreet and Kunkle

A Science Based Case for Ending the Porn Epidemic – Gobry

Fight the New Drug –Website

Why Today’s Internet Porn Is Unlike Anything The World Has Ever Seen

The Porn Phenomenon – Barna

WORSHIP: I’m Going Free (Jailbreak) – Vertical Church Band

For more information about MentorLink, go to www.mentorlink.org.

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Worldview

Or suppose a woman has ten silver coins and loses one. Doesn’t she light a lamp, sweep the house and search carefully until she finds it? And when she finds it, she calls her friends and neighbors together and says, ‘Rejoice with me; I have found my lost coin.” Luke 15:8-9

I have now written over 400 blog posts in the past 6 years. Each time I have tried to be true to bringing a biblical worldview perspective to a topic about mentoring the next generation.   Last Tuesday, Barna came out with a report on the American Worldview Inventory 2022 which was created at the Cultural Research Center at Arizona Christian University. All I can say is that it is disheartening. 

The report was based on a survey of some 600 parents asking them dozens of worldview questions that were intended to measure “both beliefs and behavior in eight categories of worldview application.”  67% of the parents identified as Christian. That’s the good news. The bad news: only 4% of those “Christian” parents identified with a Christian worldview as defined by the researchers, and only 2% of all of those surveyed had a Christian worldview.

The subtitle of the Barna report is “The Worldview Dilemma of American Parents.”  As Barna notes, one of the primary roles of a parent is to help instill in their children the concept that God has a special plan for them, and their job is to help the child prepare for it.

As George Barna notes, “Parents are not the only agents of influence on their children’s worldview, but they remain both a primary influence and a gatekeeper to other influences.”  Even though only 4% of those self-identified Christians possess a biblical worldview, it was equally shocking that none of the other “alternative” worldviews is embraced by even 1% of the parents.

Those six alternatives include: Secular Humanism, Moralistic Therapeutic Deism (MTD), Nihilism, Marxism/Critical Theory, Postmodernism and Eastern Mysticism/New Age. What does that mean?  

Barna goes on to say that 94% of parents of pre-teens have a worldview known as Syncretism, which is blending of “multiple worldviews in which no single life philosophy is dominant”.  In other words, the worldview is “diverse and often self-contradictory.”

Barna continues that most parents are likely to have garnered views drawn from Eastern Mysticism/New Age thinking, MTD and Biblical Theism (i.e., the biblical worldview). This reminds me of the old Chinese food menu when you got to choose from three different columns of food choices to make up your meal. One from Column A, one from Column B and one from Column C. Your choice.

How did this happen? How did so few children under the age of 13 have a biblical worldview. The answers, based on my research over the years is not surprising in a post-Christian world. Millennials now comprise a majority of parents of pre-teens today, and they are the least likely generation to have a biblical worldview.

A biblical worldview holds that the Bible is a “relevant and an authoritative guide for life.” Yet almost 60% of the parents surveyed view the Bible as a “reliable and accurate source of God’s truth.”  Fewer than half of the parents (45%) read the Bible at least once a week.  Research also shows that if you are not in their Bible at least Four Times a week, you are losing ground spiritually.

Additionally, only three groups of churches have “an above-average proportion of pre-teen parents who have a biblical worldview: nondenominational or independent Protestant churches, Pentecostal or charismatic churches, and finally Evangelical churches.  Attendees of the first group are eight times more likely than the national norm to have a biblical worldview. Attendees of evangelical or charismatic are three times as likely.

Add to that another recent Barna study that 56% of Christians feel their spiritual life is entirely private. That percentage changes by generation with the Boomers having the highest level (63%) of believing their spiritual life is private. Gen Z fares better (that’s the good news) and are twice as likely to be part of a discipleship community.

These studies are a lot to take in, but they are not entirely surprising in a post-Christian and postmodern world. The scripture from Luke 15 about the lost coin (and later the lost sheep) gives us instruction as to how God values everyone as something special in his creation.

As parents, grandparents, and mentors, we need to lean into the next generation in ways that helps them discover what a biblical worldview is, and even better, how valuable it is to their children. Investing in millennials’ lives by mentoring is a key to passing on our Christian heritage to their children.

MENTOR TAKEAWAY:   Mentors are in a great position to pass on to their mentees a biblical worldview. God thinks it’s important, and so do I. 

FURTHER READING:

American Worldview Inventory 2022 – Barna

Parents Lack of Biblical Worldview Puts Children at ‘Spiritual Disadvantage’  Christian Post

56% of Christians Feel Their Spiritual Life is Entirely Private – Barna

WORSHIP: Behold (Then Sings My Soul) – Hillsong

For more information about MentorLink, go to www.mentorlink.org.

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L’viv

Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ.  Galatians 6:2

Until two weeks ago, hardly anyone had ever heard of L’viv, a city of close to 720,000 located in the western part of the Ukraine. It is 50 miles away from the Polish border. It was founded in the late Middle Ages and has an almost intact medieval urban topography. It is a beautiful city. For now. 

It is front and center in the news because it is a primary gateway for refugees from eastern Ukraine to get out of the country. Two million Ukrainians have already fled the country out of a population of 44 million.  I spent time on Zoom with my friend Sasha Pyrig yesterday who lives in L’viv. He said that, so far, the city has escaped bombardment from the Russians.

Sasha described what it is like to have 200,000 refugees descend on a city.  He said every church has opened its doors to house the refugees, and that he even houses some people in his small office. Samaritans Purse is opening a hospital in L’viv and plans to have 77 doctors on staff.  

So far, food hasn’t been a problem, but the resources are wearing thin. Like the rest of the world, Sasha and his wife Luda, don’t know what the future will bring. But they are dedicated to staying and helping out in any way that they can.  Sasha has volunteered to work with Samaritan’s Purse along with other local pastors to meet the spiritual needs of the refugees and their families. 

Last night, Steve Noble did a radio interview of Slavik who also lives in L’viv and works at the Ukrainian Baptist Theological Seminary.  Classes at the seminary have been halted and the school is offering humanitarian aid to “its students, staff and graduates, as well as their extended families and friends throughout Ukraine.” 

When asked what we could do for him, Slavik said he had three needs.  The first was resources which are funded through the Ukraine Partnership Foundation. Second he asked for prayer for the Ukrainian refugees as well as the first responders who are trying to help them. And lastly, he asked for prayer for a miracle that God would intervene in some special way and end the hostilities. 

Maia Mikhaluk lives in Kyiv and has been reporting what it is like in her city on Facebook. She is connected to International Partnerships (as is Sasha Pyrig in L’viv) which she described thusly: 

“International Partnerships is a network of churches that were planted over the years by us and our teams. Our churches currently helping their communities that are suffering from war. The work includes helping territorial defense units, digging trenches on the suburbs of their cities, sheltering/feeding refugees, helping people evacuate, mobilizing food donations inside of Ukraine, and delivering to places of need. In just one village farmers butchered so many pigs that they had 10 tons of meat to preserve in jars and send to where there is a shortage of food.”

Maia’s post from last week on Day 13 of the invasion was riveting.  She started it by saying: “We thank God for another day of life! Last night for the first day since war started we slept all night in our beds.”  She went on to say that she felt guilty because the Ukrainian “defenders heroically [kept] holding Russian troops in the suburbs from entering the city. I know our restful sleep came today at the cost of many lives.”

She continues:  “The circumstances in our cities differ depending on how close they are to the front lines of defense or to routes of refugees. We do our best to respond to current needs and challenges in any way we can. When this war is over (we hope very soon!) there will be even more work in helping people rebuild their lives and their homes. But first, we need to help our defenders to stay strong and our citizens to survive.”

These are brave people who are bearing other’s burdens. What makes this entire situation different is that it is being played out on social media in a way that was not possible years ago.  If you want an idea what it actually looks like, watch the short Facebook video from Maia. One picture is worth a thousand words. 

Maia continues:  “My prayers are for women-defenders, and for women who are covering their kids’ ears during air raids, who struggle for words to explain to their children what is happening, for women who are on the road fleeing the war, leaving behind their homes destroyed by Russian barbarians, for women who say goodbye to their husbands as they cross the borders to safety while their men take arms on defense lines, my prayers are for women who are pregnant, may God give them peace and assurance that they are bringing new life into the world that will soon become a better place (after Russians are defeated and Russia chokes on economic sanctions), I pray for our little girls to grow strong! We shall overcome!”

If you are moved by these scenes as I am, you are not alone. These Christians need our help. Below are places where you can donate funds and trust that the recipients will be good stewards.  For Sasha and Maia, you can donate to International Partnerships.  

To help Slavik at the Seminary in L’viv, you can donate through the Ukraine Partnership Foundation. You can also give to Samaritan’s Purse.

Sasha, Maia and Slavik are bearing the burdens of the Ukraine people during times of distress. 

If you are like me, you feel somewhat helpless watching the events unfold in Ukraine.  You can pray for the Ukrainian civilians and their defenders who did nothing to instigate the invasion. You can pray for a miracle that God would end this hostility.  And you can give whatever God leads you to give to organizations that are on the front lines.

The next generation, particularly Generation Z, have not really had to deal with a hostility in eastern Europe. Most of them were not even born when 9/11 occurred. They have no concept of how cruel the world can be or what a humanitarian crisis looks like. That has all changed. 

As parents and mentors, this is a teachable moment. While we struggle with watching what is going on, we can show compassion in a way that the next generation can see and touch. We can regularly pray for Ukraine and its leaders and people and we can donate resources to help them survive. 

MENTOR TAKEAWAY:   Showing your mentee that you are serious about bearing one another’s burden will speak volumes to the next generation.

FURTHER RESOURCES: 

International Partnerships – Boone, NC 

Ukraine Partnership Foundation (Part of the Seminary)

Samaritans Purse Donations for Ukraine

Medical Supplies Run Low – WSJ

WORSHIP: Battle Belongs – Wickham

For more information about MentorLink, go to www.mentorlink.org.

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Ukraine

The Lord will rescue me from every evil attack and will bring me safely to his heavenly kingdom. To him be glory for ever and ever. Amen.

2 Timothy 4:18

All eyes have been focused on the Russian invasion of Ukraine less than two weeks ago. It boggles the imagination really, and presents difficult issues for the United States, Europe and the rest of the world.  

The Russian invasion has been uniformly denounced around the globe making Putin a pariah. Putin justified the invasion based on delusional historical revisionism. In his speech to the Russian nation before the attack, Putin argued that Ukrainian statehood was a fiction and was a “historical blunder committed by Vladimir Lenin” according to Jeff Jacoby of the Boston Globe.

After WWI, Lenin treated Ukraine as a separate entity from Russia and gave it autonomy which ended up treating Russia “in the sloppiest way” according to Putin.  Jacoby calls this basically historical “drivel”. Ukraine’s identity precedes that of Russia and goes back a thousand years before Lenin and the Bolshevik revolution in 1917.  The capital, Kyiv, was established centuries before Moscow. 

They share the same Orthodox Christian religion, and their languages and cuisines are related. Some of the eastern territory of Ukraine fell under the rule of tsarist Russia. But the rest of the country fell under the authority of the Austro-Hungarian empire, Poland and Lithuania.  So much for Putin’s argument that Ukraine was a 20^th century creation. 

Putin has fabricated historical fantasies before, but he comes from the position that the breakup of the Soviet Union was the greatest geopolitical catastrophe of the 20^th Century. He argued that taking Crimea in 2014 was correcting a historical injustice.

Putin gazes at the map of Eastern Europe and can only see rectifying past historical injustices is by attacking Russia’s neighbors which tramples international legal norms as a means to reassembling the old Soviet Empire.  Some now are questioning Putin’s mental stability and whether he will survive as the world turns against him and the invasion is not going as planned.

For the past week, Ukraine has dominated the stories in my Musings. At this moment, it is still a David and Goliath story, with the Ukrainian people clearly the underdog in a battle they did not initiate.  But the story I want to bring into focus is people – friends and colleagues – who are in harm’s way through no fault of their own. 

The picture above is of my friends Sasha and Luda Pyrig who live in L’viv which is in the western part of Ukraine. It is a city of about 750,000 people. Sasha is a pastor there who has the gift of Evangelism. When the Russian forces were collecting on the Eastern border, and later in Belarus, Sasha was meditating on what might happen.  He felt threatened, and for good reason. 

Right now, tens of thousands of people are trying to exit the country, and most of the roads lead through L’viv.  The son of Kent Hoffman had just transferred from Siberia to Kyiv when the battle broke out.  They left much of their belongs and headed west toward Poland where they had friends awaiting them. At one point, they sat in a line of cars for 42 hours yet were still one kilometer from the border. 

MentorLink has a deep connection to Ukraine and the other Russian Republics (FSU). Stacy Rinehart, our founder, served as the Executive Director of training and materials for Co-Mission. Co-Mission was a partnership of 84 denominations and parachurches which sent 1,868 missionaries to what was the FSU, for one year each. They were invited by the Soviet Ministry of Education to teach morality and ethics in the school system based on the life of Jesus. 

FSU is a huge country which spans 13 time zones. Co-Mission sent teams to all 68 Oblasts (states) in Russia and in Ukraine. As Stacy notes, “we loved the peoples from Russia, Ukraine, Latvia, Estonia and the other nations” where we had a presence. Our recent MentorLink prayer updates have daily prayers for our MentorLink partners and connections in Ukraine, including Sasha and Luda. 

I concur with Stacy that we are “deeply burdened for the death and destruction going on in Ukraine right now”. We are committed to pray for them daily. In a way, I feel overwhelmed by what is transpiring right now. Almost non-stop coverage of more attacks, fights and fierce battles come to me. I am not alone in this. 

What is surprising is that there has been a divide in Christianity over this as noted by Bill Muehlenberg. But one major principle survives:  the Christian believes sin has affected everything.  That means not only us, as individuals, but nations and governments and even their leaders are sinful and fallen. That’s the world we live in. 

There is plenty of corruption and things wrong in Russia and with Putin’s empirical desires. There is also plenty wrong with Zelensky and Ukraine and “neither one is all sweetness and light” according to Muelhenberg. 

But we are commanded to pray for our leaders and ask God to move in a mighty way and one which would bring glory to Himself.  In addition to prayer for our friends, we can give needed humanitarian resources through respected non-profits like Samaritan’s Purse which, among other things is setting up hospitals in the region. 

MENTOR TAKEAWAY:  As mentors, we can demonstrate compassion and prayerful resolve to our mentees by taking time to join others around the world praying for peace and safety of the Ukrainian people.

FURTHER READUNG:

Putin Says Taking Crimea Righted Historical Injustice – Reuters

Putin Finds Himself Isolated, Out of Touch as Invasion of Ukraine Sputters – WSJ

Ukrainians Are Going to Fight for Freedom – World

Samaritan’s Purse Ukrainian Response

WORSHIP: Battle Belongs – Wickham

For more information about MentorLink, go to www.mentorlink.org.

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